Post-Election Love Letter to Women, Immigrants, BIPOC Folks

Our hearts break to the extent we love. 

(By the way, you can listen to me read this love letter out loud on Apple podcast or Spotify.) 

Like many of you, I spent yesterday wrapped up in a metaphorical blanket of shock, grief, and disappointment. It felt funereal, like 2016 again. 

As a woman, an immigrant, and a person of color in the United States, this election felt personal. 

Close to 4 decades ago, my father chose this country over his birthplace of South Korea, because he believed there'd be opportunities for greater freedom and liberty for his three daughters. 

The joyous dream of seeing the first woman of color, the first Black woman, the first South Asian woman, the first daughter of immigrants elected to presidency -- remains, for now, a dream deferred. 

I coach people who share so much in common with Kamala: competent, qualified, brimming with potential. This election became emblematic for so many of us who hoped to see Kamala break the glass ceiling, because we saw ourselves in her. 

Yesterday, Kamala gave her concession speech at Howard University (you can read the full transcript here), and she consoled, thanked, acknowledged, and uplifted her supporters with unmatched dignity. 

She said: 

Don't you ever listen when anyone tells you something is impossible, because it has never been done before. You have the capacity to do extraordinary good in the world. 

After the speech, I did what coaches do: I got coached in a peer practice session. 

My peer coach, Heather, held space for me -- without judgment or alarm -- as hot tears of grief rolled down my cheeks. 

Here's what became crystal clear to me in that session: my heartbreak can co-exist with conviction. Sadness and disappointment can live alongside an unwavering belief in our capacity to do extraordinary things. 

As women, immigrants, as people marginalized in a flawed society -- even when doors to power seem to close -- we grieve, we heal, and we get back up. 

We tap into the vast resources of our minds -- deeply imaginative, creative, and generative -- to build new doors or go knock on new doors (figuratively or literally). 

In the peer coaching session, Heather guided me through mental rehearsal, a powerful technique I often share with my clients. 

In mental rehearsal, I imagined myself floating into Kamala's perspective, looking out over the crowd of young, hopeful, and tearful faces at Howard University. 

My heart swelled with gratitude, with profound love and respect for the people who share the timeless dream of equality, freedom, and extraordinary possibilities. 

This is the love I want to share with you today. 

Yours in love, heartbreak and conviction, 

Jamie